“Think of slow, enjoyable sex,” said a friend when he heard we were off to dine at Tetsuya’s. I beg to differ. Dining at Tetsuya’s is an out-of-body experience, sex just cannot compare. I have travelled the world and gourmandized at some amazing restaurants, but none can match up to the cuisine at Tetsuya’s.

Chef Tetsuya arrived into Sydney in the 80’s and had already built up a reputation by the time he set up his own restaurant in 1986. Tetsuya’s, as it stands today, was purpose built at the end of 2000. Serving Japanese fusion cuisine, the restaurant has been rated as the fifth best in the world by Conde Nast. The fact that it has a waiting list that stretches for three months is testimony in itself. Needless to say, our hotel concierge, who managed to get us our reservations, was the recipient of a grateful tip.

A simple low level building, there is no grand architecture to set this restaurant apart. However from the minute you step in, you realise there is something special about this place. It is not loud, it is not a show piece for any interior decorator but it exudes class. The art on the walls, the sculptures, even the signs on the bathroom doors are talking pieces and add to the ambience of understated aesthetics. A glass encased Japanese garden dominates the central dining room and the lush greenery adds colour to a neutrally hued room.

“Welcome to Tetsuyas. My name is Jim and I will be serving you today” and with these words we were swept into the most stunning service I have ever experienced at a restaurant. There is no menu. The meal is a degustation, a tasting menu. It changes each day according to available ingredients and of course the chef’s will. After confirming food preferences mainly to do with allergies and presumably vegetarians (which thankfully none of our group could claim as a vice) we were left in the capable hands of Tetsuya and his staff.

We began with green apple martinis for aperitifs while we perused the comprehensive wine list to make our selection. Australia has some of the world’s best vineyards and we were keen on choosing a wine from the continent. Settling on a Leeuwin estate chardonnay, we sat back to await our culinary journey. And a journey it was: Starting with the cold corn soup with saffron and vanilla ice-cream and ending fourteen courses later. Vanilla ice-cream in a soup does not sound particularly appetizing but the soup was delicious. By the end of the meal I realized that though the portions are miniscule, they do full justice to the combination of flavours with the added advantage of not filling you up and giving you room to appreciate the entire experience.

In quick succession we were then served a smoked ocean trout with avruga caviar followed by a complimentary quail yolk with scallop and tarragon mousse. The tastes were as exotic as the names with the right blend of subtlety and texture. The beauty of the entire meal was the perfect combinations and how the actual flavours are allowed full rein without the need to add any extra condiments. In fact the chef does not use too many spices. His mastery lies in his knowledge of the ingredients and how they complement each other.

The leek and crab mustard that followed had me scraping the bowl and if I were not at a restaurant, I would have used my fingers to lick every last morsel. The attention to detail is such, that this dish was served with a wooden spoon to prevent any chemical reaction with the custard. Sometimes custard has an overpowering taste of eggs, but this dish did not taste eggy. Since my husband is allergic to shell fish, his dish was made from fish instead of a crustacean.

The sashimi of big eye tuna with wasabi and ginger vinaigrette melted in the mouth and was an apt precursor to Tetsuya’s signature dish – a confit of Tasmanian ocean trout on a bed of seaweed. The dish had a fancier name but we were more interested in the basics. The preciseness of it all is what comes across: the fish, the accompaniments, the presentation all combined to make it worth the title of signature dish. Some of our group were sceptical about eating seaweed but the crisp taste blended well with the subtle flavours of the fennel salad and the trout.

Probably inspired by the obvious orgasmic delight of our group, Chef Tet himself left the confines of his kitchen to grant us an audience. In appearance he comes across as quiet, unobtrusive: a man we would not associate with a world class chef. However the twinkle in his eyes showed him to be a people’s person. Having partaken of his superb fare, I simply had to give him a hug. And I did! He promised us that the journey was not yet over and he had more gastronomic delights in store for us.

Back into his work space and chef Tetsuya sent out ravioli of divner crab with a tomato and basil vinaigrette which was polished off despite the desire to avoid carbohydrates. The grilled barramundi fillet was possibly the only disappointment of the evening. Barramundi, a fleshy white fish, is typical to the Australian continent and we had been gorging on it. I feel that justice was not done to the fish. It was under salted and did not bring out the full flavour. It could just be that the chef wanted it that way so we could experience the actual Barramundi flavour but this dish got a thumb down.

It was time to move out of the sea world and onto land. Our first dish was breast of duck with braised witlof with sansho and walnut jus. What followed this is, in my opinion, the definitive dish, even more than the signature dish of trout – grilled wagyu beef with lime and wasabi. It was served with a ponsu jelly and wood ear mushroom. Wagyu beef is a particular strain of beef from Japan which has been successfully bred in Australia. The Japanese black wagyu cattle produce a high percentage of unsaturated fat, in its famed Kobe beef, than any other cattle in the world. Served perfectly medium rare, the knife just slid through the beef and melted into the mouth as soon as it slipped onto the tongue. I had to close my eyes to savour the culinary high this sensation gave me. There was no need for the lime or wasabi so succulent was the meat. I wanted to hold on to the taste forever.

A roasted loin of venison served with capers and parsley jus was a complimentary addition to the degustation. Venison refers to meat from the deer family. It is similar in flavour to beef with less fat and fewer calories and cholesterol. The meat was cooked to dissolve as soon as it came into contact with the tongue. The sharp tanginess of the capers and the delicate parsley jus enhanced the flavour of the meat.

Before dessert was served, it was time to cleanse the palate. No sorbet for this restaurant. Instead we were served a comte with lentils to clean our orifice and prepare it for the next gastronomic onslaught. It was an unusual twist, one we regarded suspiciously, but Tetsuya knows his food. It worked and couldn’t have been a more apt choice. Our expectations were not too high when it came to desserts. How could any dessert live up to such a gourmet meal? The desserts refused to accept that as a reason. Each one that was placed on our table out flavoured the other. The marinated peaches with vodka and peach sorbet summer pudding, the banana mousse and caramel ice cream and the chocolate terrine with mascarpone and cognac anglaise jostled with each other for the first spot. However it was the last dessert, with the compliments of the chef, which had me sold - a blue cheese mousse with pear droppings. The sharp flavour of the blue cheese combined with the tiny droplets of pear added a tangy sweetness to the dessert making it just right: cheese and fruit with a difference.

We did not feel like stirring from the restaurant. As we sipped sake and ordered cognac, we savoured the experience, each one commenting on his or her favourite dish. “Sorry to interrupt, but we have two taxis waiting for you”, said a quiet voice at my shoulder. A quick glance at my watch made me swallow in disbelief. Without even realizing, we had been at our table for four straight hours. I have never had such a prolonged meal before. Meals half the time have left me staggering from over indulgence. This felt just right. I was full without being uncomfortable. I had probably had the best meal of my life and eating out would never be the same again.

There is no doubt about it, if it’s Sydney; it has to be Tetsuya’s.